Thanks to my brother we had great photos and graphics. And my dream was a brunch at The Norman with my family, friends and work colleagues. It was so hard to wait and not be able to plan, but the minute he was born we were on it. It was the perfect celebration and I’m glad I listened to moms advice: to separate the actual Brit Milah from the celebration. We did a small intimate family gathering at our house with the mohel. I cried a lot. The baby was fine and then we walked to The Norman Hotel and had a great festive brunch, and I had a lot of bread pudding. Baby slept through the whole thing and I couldn’t show off his bow tie and ‘schleykes’…

A third child is like what I was used to hear from others. Lovey Dovey. The first three months were pure bliss. He completed us but at the same time the girls weren’t too disturbed by his arrival. We prepared them well by using the usual tricks: lots of talking, a baby gift to/from him, involving them in his life yet maintaining their routine and attention. I got my girls a personalized Peppa Pig Christmas book as baby was due around Hanukkah. In the early months it’s easier, babies eat and sleep mostly so he was with me, on me and the girls loved caring for a baby brother without feeling their mom or dad were less available and nothing in their routine changed. The Japanese Spa in Jaffa was a true treat and amazing birth gift as Raphael came with me and enjoyed every second…

But then came March, Purim and Covid19 invaded Israel too. Overnight my work ceased – yes I was working during my ‘maternity leave’ on upcoming shows that sadly never happened. And as he turned three months, he had his first fever. A third baby with two older siblings in daycare in winter would of course create viruses other new babies wouldn’t be exposed to. But this one was scary because we were just catapulted into our first lockdown. And god bless my amazing friend and pediatrician Dr. Herman who is always there to evaluate and comfort. You never get used to a sick baby. God bless the inventor of the suppository – I looked it up and it’s as ancient as the Greek and Romans – when my baby has the highest fever I’ve seen I just cry and worry, seeing your baby suffer is just unbearable and one never gets used to it. At least now I don’t fear the suppository anymore. A short praise for breastfeeding again. I would never judge you if you don’t but I’ll always encourage you to try. For short and long term benefits, for bonding aspects. I believe what I read when breastmilk adapts to the baby’s needs: more fluids, more antibodies to fight diseases and I believe they regain their power faster. I also see how they start eating solids with more force as their sucking reflex is very developed. Another thing I praise and again, doesn’t mean it works for all of us is co-sleeping: I never felt tired with this baby (remember the concept of breastsleeping for both mother & child). From day one, Raphael slept on me, then later next to me and a year later he still refuses his bed. I don’t mind, I breastfeed in my sleep and I wake up fresh every morning. We always end up all together in bed. I remember a parent with teenagers once telling me how his kids don’t want him to enter their room so for me it’s clear: let’s cuddle and co-sleep as much as we can as long as they let us….

A few words on our months in lockdown mode: I consider my kids to be in the ‘ok’ age for a pandemic meaning we have it relatively easy. Let me explain: first lockdown was easy as baby was just 3 months young and we created a great routine at home together focused on the essentials: food, home and us. Second lockdown was a bit more challenging as Raphael was already crawling, eating food and touching everything (needless to mention the amount of danger with two older siblings i.e Barbie shoes, beads etc. That’s when I finally took that online CPR Class) By the way, why do babies always want to play with dangerous objects instead of their own toys? What does this say about the consumer society we live in? I’ll refer to my first post on motherhood: false needs created by society…

As much as I miss my work and live shows, timing was fine for managing three kids. Instead of being the show production team we became the home production team – multitasking as in handling the house the garden the kitchen and keep the kids fed, alive and happy. I hope we can all see the silver lining of this pandemic. See what it’s teaching us: to connect to the here & now with our families. The joy of basic and simple family time. To be able to just play with the kids despite laundry, mess or other home chores. As a mom with a radio show called Unwind Rewind I wish I could tell you I master the art of just being. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. I feel so blessed and grateful when I see my girls get along so great and play for hours with each other in their own imaginative and creative world. They are two years apart and so different (maybe that is the secret to such a fun and complementing connection?). Maybe the parents deserve some credit here too. They started as lovers, then became a couple and now a family (and a production team). When man and woman team up and can complete each other kindly; they can see the fruit of their labour in their children.

So yes lockdowns had their ups and downs and triggered some deep rooted issues to be solved and that’s where the holy me time comes in. Not to be defined in time or space but essential to any mother-woman. I always had trouble hearing parents complaining how hard it is. Yes there are challenges and your me time is often compromised but I repeat: as long as our kids are healthy and happy nothing should be defined HARD. I know one of the secrets to our parental success may be our age:. I had more than enough time before to do all of that – traveling, social, personal and any other achievements. No FOMO Yes JOMO. Being a mother to Nellie, Noa & Raphael is the greatest gift I could ever get and the light & love they bring goes beyond my imagination. Every day I love them more than yesterday but less than tomorrow. Whoever knows me knows I wasn’t really into kids before having my own. So when it gets a little intense, just take a deep breath; before you know they’re all asleep and you’ll be looking at their photos before crashing (and canceling all those other things you intended to do: Netflix, bath, dishes, read, knit etc)

Every baby phase has its perks and its challenges in the first year. I cry over many moments that pass and will not return. Oh please, if I may give you a tip: write things down! Look at their huge baby books on the photo: weekly notes during pregnancy, drawings, souvenirs, little anecdotes, achievements etc. So how to conclude? Only you know which parent you are or want to become. Listen to your gut and follow the cues of your child(ren) instead of trying to control the situation at all times. The children know and they teach us if we connect to them. The key to successful (or conscious or mindfulness) parenting is to be present; be in the here & now with them. And yes, there is a big difference between your approach towards your first second and third child. First you can tell by the dirt and the amount of stuff in your stroller. The biggest challenge is to balance the guilt of sharing – or let’s say juggle – the attention between all kiddos. And not only to the one who screams the most or the loudest.